Patti and I went window-shopping for a new TV a couple of weeks ago. We stopped in front of a plasma screen and watched a women's softball game.

“Holy crap,” I said. “Look at the clarity of that dust when she slid into home! I have never been more into lesbians than at this moment.”

Patti looked at the price tag and asked, "Do you wanna get married or get a plasma TV first?"

“That's a tough choice,” I said. “They both sound pretty good.”